16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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