I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
