his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
