I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
