its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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