So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
where are my pants?
in the oven.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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