i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
