Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize