You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
