I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Never underestimate the power of titties
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
