Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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