so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
