No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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