u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
