i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
