it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
