Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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