my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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