Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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