Kiss
Puke
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
