bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
