So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
