im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I believe in your delicious
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
