You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
and you fell through a lawn chair
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
