Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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