in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
