I'm really into asian looking animals
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
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