508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
