hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
