Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
people are starting to question the shark bite story
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
