youre lurking in front of me
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize