Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
