no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Text me some of your sweat
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
