You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
