I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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