her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I will die if light touches me.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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