I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
