I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize