this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
