Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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