I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
