we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
