He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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