also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Randomize