so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
handjob tips. give me some.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
