We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
