i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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