What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
