We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
