I want to stick my p in your. b.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
