The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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